In this article, Janet explains a very important point of view...
The Prosperous Life
"A generous man will prosper; he who refreshes others will
himself be refreshed." Proverbs 11:25
Most of us want to be successful, well off, and live the good
life. Did you ever consider that the way to accomplish this
might not be grabbing all you can, but by giving your way there?
Did you consider that the way up the ladder of life might be
going outward instead of upward? This seems foreign to us and
absolutely contrary to everything we are taught in society.
After all, we are taught that we if we do not look out for
ourselves, who will?
Jesus mentioned much about giving during his earthly
ministry... "Give and it shall be given to you. A good measure,
pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured
into your lap. Do to others as you would have them do to you. If
someone takes your cloak, give them your tunic too."( Luke
6:29,31,38)
Jesus talked about a generous lifestyle that many of us shy
away from. If we are honest in the deepest part of our beings,
we have to admit that when it comes to giving we are often
afraid.
Prime Minister Golda Meir once said, "You can't shake hands
with a clinched fist." When we have a clenched fist approach to
life, by holding on tightly to our money, time and possessions,
we become the losers. The very thing we desire escapes us. When
we have generous spirits, I believe generosity has a way of
finding us as well... "A generous man will prosper; he who
refreshes others will himself be refreshed."
So, sometimes you just have to start where you are and with
what you have in order to cultivate a generous spirit. Giving
doesn't always have to be monetary. How could you make a
difference at your work place or in your neighborhood? Can you
make a dinner for someone? What about writing a note to your
postman or garbage collector? Can you volunteer at a homeless
shelter or the Salvation Army or a nursing home? What about
getting your kids involved? Can you give up a couple of lattes a
month and save money to fund a project your family can get
involved in.
Let your kids pick it out and save some of their allowance
towards it. Check out www.kiva.org for some great projects to
get behind!
Some of the most joyful and content people in our world today
are givers. We have seen what society offers - bankruptcy,
divorce, suicide, etc. Open up your hands and your hearts to
refresh someone else and watch your life take on a new dimension
of blessing!
About The Author: Janet Daughtry, MDIV, CBC, is a certified
life coach helping women unlock their potential and pursue their
dreams. Visit her website at http://www.CoachJanet.com .
Monday, September 10, 2007
Friday, June 29, 2007
How The Silent Treatment Creates Customers
If you own or operate a business, this article might help you
increase the effectiveness of your sales strategy...
How The Silent Treatment Creates Customers
Copyright (c) 2007 Mark Silver
Heart Of Business
http://www.heartofbusiness.com/
Sooner or later you will have to ask someone to buy something
from you. Whether you have a retail store, and a couple has been
admiring an expensive couch for the last 20 minutes, or you are a
consultant or coach who has just finished an initial conversation
with a potential client, the question is waiting to be asked.
"So, are you ready to buy?"
I've found that this is a very sacred time, when a potential
sale is approaching. Because it is so sacred, after you ask
someone to purchase, the moment can feel very pregnant indeed.
The air can suddenly seem so thick you could cut it with a
knife.
As a business owner, the worst thing you can do is splash into
this space with more words. It's time to be silent and wait for
their answer. After all, you asked a question, it's their turn
now. It's best to be silent and wait.
But why is it so tempting to jump in?
When you ask the question, what you are really doing is painting
a picture of the future. They don't have a couch, and you've
just painted a picture of the future where they suddenly have a
couch. They also have less money than they did before (having
spent it on the couch.) It's a future they haven't lived in
yet.
But they've already been considering the purchase for at least
20 minutes, possibly much longer, why should your question add to
the situation? Because they can't create that future on their
own: they need your help. When you show up and ask the question,
all the pieces line up to make this potential future a reality.
It helps them step towards the future they want.
Suddenly, it's real.
Sufi teachings, as well as quantum physics, teach us that reality
is being created anew in every moment. We're all 99.9% empty
space, with some charged particles bouncing around inside. The
experience of our physical reality is constantly in motion, being
given life again and again and again in every new version of the
Now.
Mostly we live in oblivion of this (thankfully). It would be
pretty hard to get through the day if you had to experience the
utter nothingness and miracle of rebirth every time you sit down
to eat your grapefruit.
I'm not going to suggest that every time someone considers
buying from you you need to deliver an ecstatic moment :-). But I
do believe that whenever we consider taking an action that could
significantly change our lives, strong emotions come to the
surface.
Your question is the catalyst.
When you ask the question, you suddenly took a powerful
potentiality and --boom-- solidifed it. And your future is at
stake too- in a few minutes you may no longer have a couch, and
your business may be $2000 richer.
Once you ask the question, the most effective thing you can do is
give your potential customer the silent treatment. Just be quiet.
Shhh. Zip it. Don't say anything.
Mmmmphpbbbmmmhphbb...
Shush! :-)
Why it's so hard to stay silent: Sympathy versus Empathy
Sympathy is "feelings of pity and sorrow for another's
misfortune." Empathy is "the ability to understand and share
the feelings of another." Most of us are trained, in challenging
situations, to go into sympathy.
Example of sympathy: "I'm so sorry the garbage truck smashed
your car." Example of empathy: "I saw what that truck did to
your car. I'm guessing you are pretty angry and upset."
The difference? The sympathetic statement focused on you- how you
felt about your friend's car. The empathy focused a statement of
witnessing "I saw what the truck did to your car," and then
your best reasonable, heart-felt guess on how your friend feels
about their own car. In sympathy, you steal the spotlight.
Empathy you give the other person centerstage.
So how can you keep silent? And what does it have to do with your
business?
Keys to the Silent Treatment, and an example
* While you are sitting there silent, instead of focusing on
them, bring your attention to yourself. How are you feeling?
Nervous? Tense? Excited? Enthusiastic? Let yourself take a few
moments, your prospective customers won't notice- they're busy
in their own thoughts. Notice how your body feels, notice any
emotions you are feeling. Don't try to change your emotions- if
you are nervous, be nervous! Notice how nervous feels, and make
space for it. And breathe.
* After you've checked in, begin to ask your heart, "Hmmm, if
I'm feeling this way, I'm wondering how they might be
feeling." Look at them, or, if you are on the phone, pay
attention to the tone of their voice. Do they sound or look
tense? Excited? Calm? See if you can empathize- that is, feel the
same feelings you are imagining they might have.
* Finally, bring your attention to your heart. If you have done
the Remembrance, or another heart-centering exercise, you may
have noticed a vast feeling of spaciousness in your heart. That
space is big enough to hold how you feel, and how your
prospective customer feels, without needing to change or fix
anything.
* Example: Someone called me about coaching- someone who is
'known' in their world, and I was a little nervous thinking
"This person called little me." In discussing my individual
services, and my price, I realized I was starting to babble a
little bit. I took a breath, made room for my nervousness, and
the tension in my shoulders and belly. I reminded myself it was
okay, that I was here only to be of service, which of course
reminded me that they called me- that they needed help. Ahhh,
maybe I don't need to be so nervous after all. This person needs
help... hmmm... I wonder how they are feeling?
Staying in my heart, using Remembrance to connect to them
silently, I zipped my lips, and only answered the questions
asked. Result? New client. Why? I'm convinced it wasn't my
fancy words, but my silence.
Let yourself rest in that spaciousness, and wait to hear how your
prospective customer answers your question. If they ask a
question, answer it, and then rest back into your heart. You'll
be giving them the heart-centered silent treatment.
And you might be surprised when they say, "Yes. How do I pay?"
The best to you and your business,
Mark Silver
----------------------------------------------------------
Mark Silver is the author of Unveiling the Heart of Your
Business: How Money, Marketing and Sales can Deepen Your
Heart, Heal the World, and Still Add to Your Bottom Line.
He has helped hundreds of small business owners around
the globe succeed in business without losing their
hearts. Get three free chapters of the book online:
http://www.heartofbusiness.com
increase the effectiveness of your sales strategy...
How The Silent Treatment Creates Customers
Copyright (c) 2007 Mark Silver
Heart Of Business
http://www.heartofbusiness.com/
Sooner or later you will have to ask someone to buy something
from you. Whether you have a retail store, and a couple has been
admiring an expensive couch for the last 20 minutes, or you are a
consultant or coach who has just finished an initial conversation
with a potential client, the question is waiting to be asked.
"So, are you ready to buy?"
I've found that this is a very sacred time, when a potential
sale is approaching. Because it is so sacred, after you ask
someone to purchase, the moment can feel very pregnant indeed.
The air can suddenly seem so thick you could cut it with a
knife.
As a business owner, the worst thing you can do is splash into
this space with more words. It's time to be silent and wait for
their answer. After all, you asked a question, it's their turn
now. It's best to be silent and wait.
But why is it so tempting to jump in?
When you ask the question, what you are really doing is painting
a picture of the future. They don't have a couch, and you've
just painted a picture of the future where they suddenly have a
couch. They also have less money than they did before (having
spent it on the couch.) It's a future they haven't lived in
yet.
But they've already been considering the purchase for at least
20 minutes, possibly much longer, why should your question add to
the situation? Because they can't create that future on their
own: they need your help. When you show up and ask the question,
all the pieces line up to make this potential future a reality.
It helps them step towards the future they want.
Suddenly, it's real.
Sufi teachings, as well as quantum physics, teach us that reality
is being created anew in every moment. We're all 99.9% empty
space, with some charged particles bouncing around inside. The
experience of our physical reality is constantly in motion, being
given life again and again and again in every new version of the
Now.
Mostly we live in oblivion of this (thankfully). It would be
pretty hard to get through the day if you had to experience the
utter nothingness and miracle of rebirth every time you sit down
to eat your grapefruit.
I'm not going to suggest that every time someone considers
buying from you you need to deliver an ecstatic moment :-). But I
do believe that whenever we consider taking an action that could
significantly change our lives, strong emotions come to the
surface.
Your question is the catalyst.
When you ask the question, you suddenly took a powerful
potentiality and --boom-- solidifed it. And your future is at
stake too- in a few minutes you may no longer have a couch, and
your business may be $2000 richer.
Once you ask the question, the most effective thing you can do is
give your potential customer the silent treatment. Just be quiet.
Shhh. Zip it. Don't say anything.
Mmmmphpbbbmmmhphbb...
Shush! :-)
Why it's so hard to stay silent: Sympathy versus Empathy
Sympathy is "feelings of pity and sorrow for another's
misfortune." Empathy is "the ability to understand and share
the feelings of another." Most of us are trained, in challenging
situations, to go into sympathy.
Example of sympathy: "I'm so sorry the garbage truck smashed
your car." Example of empathy: "I saw what that truck did to
your car. I'm guessing you are pretty angry and upset."
The difference? The sympathetic statement focused on you- how you
felt about your friend's car. The empathy focused a statement of
witnessing "I saw what the truck did to your car," and then
your best reasonable, heart-felt guess on how your friend feels
about their own car. In sympathy, you steal the spotlight.
Empathy you give the other person centerstage.
So how can you keep silent? And what does it have to do with your
business?
Keys to the Silent Treatment, and an example
* While you are sitting there silent, instead of focusing on
them, bring your attention to yourself. How are you feeling?
Nervous? Tense? Excited? Enthusiastic? Let yourself take a few
moments, your prospective customers won't notice- they're busy
in their own thoughts. Notice how your body feels, notice any
emotions you are feeling. Don't try to change your emotions- if
you are nervous, be nervous! Notice how nervous feels, and make
space for it. And breathe.
* After you've checked in, begin to ask your heart, "Hmmm, if
I'm feeling this way, I'm wondering how they might be
feeling." Look at them, or, if you are on the phone, pay
attention to the tone of their voice. Do they sound or look
tense? Excited? Calm? See if you can empathize- that is, feel the
same feelings you are imagining they might have.
* Finally, bring your attention to your heart. If you have done
the Remembrance, or another heart-centering exercise, you may
have noticed a vast feeling of spaciousness in your heart. That
space is big enough to hold how you feel, and how your
prospective customer feels, without needing to change or fix
anything.
* Example: Someone called me about coaching- someone who is
'known' in their world, and I was a little nervous thinking
"This person called little me." In discussing my individual
services, and my price, I realized I was starting to babble a
little bit. I took a breath, made room for my nervousness, and
the tension in my shoulders and belly. I reminded myself it was
okay, that I was here only to be of service, which of course
reminded me that they called me- that they needed help. Ahhh,
maybe I don't need to be so nervous after all. This person needs
help... hmmm... I wonder how they are feeling?
Staying in my heart, using Remembrance to connect to them
silently, I zipped my lips, and only answered the questions
asked. Result? New client. Why? I'm convinced it wasn't my
fancy words, but my silence.
Let yourself rest in that spaciousness, and wait to hear how your
prospective customer answers your question. If they ask a
question, answer it, and then rest back into your heart. You'll
be giving them the heart-centered silent treatment.
And you might be surprised when they say, "Yes. How do I pay?"
The best to you and your business,
Mark Silver
----------------------------------------------------------
Mark Silver is the author of Unveiling the Heart of Your
Business: How Money, Marketing and Sales can Deepen Your
Heart, Heal the World, and Still Add to Your Bottom Line.
He has helped hundreds of small business owners around
the globe succeed in business without losing their
hearts. Get three free chapters of the book online:
http://www.heartofbusiness.com
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
5 Tips On How To Create Prosperity Without Money!
Sounds crazy I know, but it really is true! I want to give
you 5 Tips that will help you create Prosperity starting
today.
Tip #1 Whatever is on the inside will be your reality! Even
nature verifies this. On the inside of an apple seed is an
apple tree, not an orange tree. You cannot get a peach from
a lemon seed.
Tell me, can you get kangaroo from a fish? Here is a fact,
"like begets like". Whatever is on the inside is going to
give birth to what is on the outside.
So doesn't it stand to reason whatever is on the inside of
you will be on the outside. The inside always give birth to
what will be on the outside.
Most people believe Prosperity is all about figuring out
how to create money. Not so, prosperity begins on the
inside. So the question is, what do you have on the inside?
That's easy!
When you look at a peach tree can you tell what is on the
inside of the seed. Absolutely!
Tip #2 Look at the outside if you want to know what is on
the inside! Put clean water in a dirty glass and you have
contaminated water. The same holds true with prosperity.
Put money in a lack or scarcity mindset and you will
struggle making ends meet no matter how much income you
create.
How can you tell what is on the inside of you. Easy, look
at the outside. No. I am not talking about all the toys,
everyone knows that can be deceiving.
There is a simple way to know what is on the inside, no one
can hide it. It's your speech. Does your speech reflect
prosperity and abundance, or scarcity and lack.
Most people don't pay much attention to their words. But
awareness always precedes change. Remember your words are a
mirror of your soul or heart.
Have you ever listened to people, I mean really listened. I
want, I need, I wish, what if, but, I can't..... what kind
of words do speak regularly
They will tell you what is on the inside, prosperity or
lack.
Of course it becomes obvious in other ways as well. Such
as, always struggling and never having enough.... behind
on things and the list goes on.
Tip #3 It's time to make the change! If you want a
different outcome then you have one choice, change. You can
change your words, thoughts, feelings, attitude---notice
there is an inward progression here.
Once you become aware of the above, you have a choice.
Change Or stay the same. Choices have an exact outcome,
they always have a specific result.
So if you want prosperity to be set in motion then simply
make the prosperous choice. Immediately you activate
prosperity.
So awareness must lead to action. That action brings
change, and change gives you a specific result.
Here is where a lot of people experience, success then
failure…. You get some wins under your belt then suddenly
you are back where You were.
Tip #4 Permanent change should be seemingly effortless!
Have you ever read a book, had a conversation, or watched
TV. before Going to bed and you dream about it all night?
Or maybe had a tough problem to solve with a deadline, and
you wake up in the morning' with the answer?
That is your subconscious at work! Your subconscious is the
inside. It determines what will be on the inside. This is
where all your old Programs are that need to be deleted,
and replaced with the new.
Change that happens at this level is permanent, at least
until they are changed. So how does change occur here?
Here is one simple way. The time before that, sleeping
state, and the time just after opening your eyes are
perfect for change.
It's the time you can turn things over to your subconscious
and allow It to work on your behalf. This is effortless. If
you struggle, you did not turn it over and leave it. Turn
it over and let it go!
Here's one way to turn it over. Ask questions. This fires
up your Subconscious and puts it to work. But, you must ask
the right Questions.
Why is this happening to me is not a good question. A
better question would be, what change needs to happen in
order for me to prosper.
When the answer comes, and it will, that is what you want
to really think about during those times just before and
after sleep. This will replace those old self sabotage
programs that fire off and set you back effortlessly.
Tip #5 Live out your change! Once the change is in place
it's simple, live out the change. You don't have to live in
fear. Have a little faith, and let the change happen.
At this point it should be automatic, without much effort
at all.
Prosperity begins on the inside, and you can Create
Prosperity Without Money. It's pretty simple!
About the Author:
Prosperity loves speed and rewards those that take action.
Hard to believe prosperity can activated in one day let
alone 29 seconds. If you are ready to set prosperity in
motion visit Prosperity Secrets Unplugged today!
http://www.prosperitysecretsunplugged.com
Anthony Kollar
Click here to learn about The Science of Getting Rich
you 5 Tips that will help you create Prosperity starting
today.
Tip #1 Whatever is on the inside will be your reality! Even
nature verifies this. On the inside of an apple seed is an
apple tree, not an orange tree. You cannot get a peach from
a lemon seed.
Tell me, can you get kangaroo from a fish? Here is a fact,
"like begets like". Whatever is on the inside is going to
give birth to what is on the outside.
So doesn't it stand to reason whatever is on the inside of
you will be on the outside. The inside always give birth to
what will be on the outside.
Most people believe Prosperity is all about figuring out
how to create money. Not so, prosperity begins on the
inside. So the question is, what do you have on the inside?
That's easy!
When you look at a peach tree can you tell what is on the
inside of the seed. Absolutely!
Tip #2 Look at the outside if you want to know what is on
the inside! Put clean water in a dirty glass and you have
contaminated water. The same holds true with prosperity.
Put money in a lack or scarcity mindset and you will
struggle making ends meet no matter how much income you
create.
How can you tell what is on the inside of you. Easy, look
at the outside. No. I am not talking about all the toys,
everyone knows that can be deceiving.
There is a simple way to know what is on the inside, no one
can hide it. It's your speech. Does your speech reflect
prosperity and abundance, or scarcity and lack.
Most people don't pay much attention to their words. But
awareness always precedes change. Remember your words are a
mirror of your soul or heart.
Have you ever listened to people, I mean really listened. I
want, I need, I wish, what if, but, I can't..... what kind
of words do speak regularly
They will tell you what is on the inside, prosperity or
lack.
Of course it becomes obvious in other ways as well. Such
as, always struggling and never having enough.... behind
on things and the list goes on.
Tip #3 It's time to make the change! If you want a
different outcome then you have one choice, change. You can
change your words, thoughts, feelings, attitude---notice
there is an inward progression here.
Once you become aware of the above, you have a choice.
Change Or stay the same. Choices have an exact outcome,
they always have a specific result.
So if you want prosperity to be set in motion then simply
make the prosperous choice. Immediately you activate
prosperity.
So awareness must lead to action. That action brings
change, and change gives you a specific result.
Here is where a lot of people experience, success then
failure…. You get some wins under your belt then suddenly
you are back where You were.
Tip #4 Permanent change should be seemingly effortless!
Have you ever read a book, had a conversation, or watched
TV. before Going to bed and you dream about it all night?
Or maybe had a tough problem to solve with a deadline, and
you wake up in the morning' with the answer?
That is your subconscious at work! Your subconscious is the
inside. It determines what will be on the inside. This is
where all your old Programs are that need to be deleted,
and replaced with the new.
Change that happens at this level is permanent, at least
until they are changed. So how does change occur here?
Here is one simple way. The time before that, sleeping
state, and the time just after opening your eyes are
perfect for change.
It's the time you can turn things over to your subconscious
and allow It to work on your behalf. This is effortless. If
you struggle, you did not turn it over and leave it. Turn
it over and let it go!
Here's one way to turn it over. Ask questions. This fires
up your Subconscious and puts it to work. But, you must ask
the right Questions.
Why is this happening to me is not a good question. A
better question would be, what change needs to happen in
order for me to prosper.
When the answer comes, and it will, that is what you want
to really think about during those times just before and
after sleep. This will replace those old self sabotage
programs that fire off and set you back effortlessly.
Tip #5 Live out your change! Once the change is in place
it's simple, live out the change. You don't have to live in
fear. Have a little faith, and let the change happen.
At this point it should be automatic, without much effort
at all.
Prosperity begins on the inside, and you can Create
Prosperity Without Money. It's pretty simple!
About the Author:
Prosperity loves speed and rewards those that take action.
Hard to believe prosperity can activated in one day let
alone 29 seconds. If you are ready to set prosperity in
motion visit Prosperity Secrets Unplugged today!
http://www.prosperitysecretsunplugged.com
Anthony Kollar
Click here to learn about The Science of Getting Rich
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Choosing Prosperity
Choosing prosperity is a mindset whereby you invoke the Law of Attraction to draw prosperity into your life. As we know from The Secret, the thoughts we think become the the things we hold.
The life we see before us now is the product of our past thoughts. If you continue to hold the same thoughts as you have done in the past, you will continue to attract more of the same old same old into your life.
Many of the great people throughout the ages admitted to using exactly this process to achieve their success. This is not just some "pie in the sky" concept dreamed up by Hollywood!
Getting Started
Looking for a more prosperous life? You need to start to train your sub-conscious to attract that prosperity for you.
The sub-conscious mind is an extremely powerful agent of change in your life. It acts upon your thoughts and if your thoughts are those of lack or unhappiness, it will attract more of it. Thinking prosperous and happy thoughts? Your sub-conscious will attract more of the things that produce those feelings.
Your inner mind is like a child and doesn't know if the things you think of are good or bad for you. It simply works to attract more of the things into your life that you focus upon.
It has a very strong connection to the universal power that drives our existence. This connection enables your sub-conscious mind to draw on many different resources to bring your most powerful thoughts into reality.
The best time to "talk" to your inner mind is just before going to sleep at night. As you lay in bed, ask it to guide you in thoughts and actions to produce a more prosperous life for yourself.
Learn to pay attention to feelings you have which seem to be telling you to do something. These are often subtle messages from your inner-self. This is how the guidance you seek normally comes to you.
In my next post, I'm going to give you more examples of how you can put your life on the prosperous path and keep it there.
If you would like some more information now on how to bring more success into your life, click the link below to visit Gary Vurnum's success website, which is full of great ways to turn your life into a success story.
Click here to visit Gary's website...
To your success!
The life we see before us now is the product of our past thoughts. If you continue to hold the same thoughts as you have done in the past, you will continue to attract more of the same old same old into your life.
Many of the great people throughout the ages admitted to using exactly this process to achieve their success. This is not just some "pie in the sky" concept dreamed up by Hollywood!
Getting Started
Looking for a more prosperous life? You need to start to train your sub-conscious to attract that prosperity for you.
The sub-conscious mind is an extremely powerful agent of change in your life. It acts upon your thoughts and if your thoughts are those of lack or unhappiness, it will attract more of it. Thinking prosperous and happy thoughts? Your sub-conscious will attract more of the things that produce those feelings.
Your inner mind is like a child and doesn't know if the things you think of are good or bad for you. It simply works to attract more of the things into your life that you focus upon.
It has a very strong connection to the universal power that drives our existence. This connection enables your sub-conscious mind to draw on many different resources to bring your most powerful thoughts into reality.
The best time to "talk" to your inner mind is just before going to sleep at night. As you lay in bed, ask it to guide you in thoughts and actions to produce a more prosperous life for yourself.
Learn to pay attention to feelings you have which seem to be telling you to do something. These are often subtle messages from your inner-self. This is how the guidance you seek normally comes to you.
In my next post, I'm going to give you more examples of how you can put your life on the prosperous path and keep it there.
If you would like some more information now on how to bring more success into your life, click the link below to visit Gary Vurnum's success website, which is full of great ways to turn your life into a success story.
Click here to visit Gary's website...
To your success!
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